I’m quite disturbed today. I posted earlier this day about Discipline Starts At Home wherein I shared about the 2 kids that are also staying with us. The eldest child, an 11 year old boy, actually has special needs. Sure, he can comprehend but not like every other normal kids his age. He had late development with his speech and he has intellectual deficiency. I think his level of comprehension is equivalent to a 3 or 4 year old kid, although in some instances, he tried to catch up with his age. Before, I used not to believe that he was an ADHD child. I don’t want to label him with that. I also found out before that he can be taught as long as someone would give him proper guidance. Now that I see the child up close and personal, I’ve clearly noticed his being hyperactive and having attention deficiency.
Despite that, he was given or tolerated with food that are not advisable for him. He loves to eat anything sweet and I seldom saw him drunk coffee. I made a side remark to his mom and even to my in-law that it’s not good for him. Sometimes, I heard them agree but most of the time, I heard nothing. I did that remark to get their attention, I don’t care if they find me rude. I just want them to really know. When I saw the child drinking cola, I would really tell him not to drink anymore or he can’t go to sleep. Sometimes, he listen to me and I was happy that he tried. His younger sister talked clearly than he does. My daughter, who is advanced for her age, would kept on correcting him and kept asking me why he talked differently. I tried to explain to my daughter the easiest explanation I could give. Anyway, going back to the boy, I tried to correct him and he seemed to follow. Coz I’ve noticed nobody tried to correct his mistakes. Even a simple food like longganisa he cannot recognize. Why? Because when he said that the food is a hotdog, his mom would also agree to him that it’s a hotdog even though it’s a longganisa. I can’t stand it! When the mom left, I told him it’s not a hotdog but a longganisa and he followed. So, everytime I heard him addressing things the wrong way, I tried to tell him the correct description. Nobody also corrected him when he said he wanted to buy Play Tation. My daughter got irritated, haha. But I repeated to the boy to pronounce it as Play – Station and to repeat after me..well, he did it right. Proper guidance is the key here.
This afternoon, he played at our neighbor. By 3pm he went out to use his bike. Remember, he’s new in our place and doesn’t know the street where we live in. I’m not even sure if he knew our family name. My ma-in-law called him several times to go home. His mother was at their place cleaning the house that was hit by the typhoon. She was out the whole day. 5 pm came and the kid didn’t return. The mother came home around 5:30, tired and so weary and was agitated by the news that her son didn’t return yet. Until my husband’s cousin came to help to search for the boy. Hubby arrived almost 7pm and still the boy didn’t return. Even my brother in-law, who came to get something from our house, was quite irritated yet can’t help but be worried. This is the boy that my father in-law saved together with him at the wire post. Now, my FIL could not do something about it but only to shake his head. I was also worried but irritated. They lived in our house for over a week and I what I also noticed was their lack of discipline. We were worried that he might be lost or got side-swept by the vehicles but also mad for not listening. I kept on checking outside the house if he returned but there was no sign of him. He’s a special child and he should be well-monitored. He had short attention span therefore he cannot be left all by himself. I cannot blame my in-laws. They’ve done their part and their quite old to follow every boy’s move. (By the way, to give a brief background, the boy’s mom is the niece of my mother-in-law. The boy’s not really a direct grandson of my FIL yet he saved him. But all he got in return was a pain the neck.)
Finally, around 7:30 pm, my MIL (mother-in-law), BIL (he drove around to find the boy) and the mother arrived at home together with the boy. I heard scolding outside the house and all. I told my daughter to stay at the dining table and continue eating and not to mind other people’s business. Turned out that the boy was playing at the internet cafe nearby. His bike was found by my hubby’s cousin so all of them went there. My MIL got so mad that she scolded and I think, spanked the boy. Even my BIL raised his voice and decided to get the boy’s bike. After all, it wasn’t his bike at all. I found out later that the mother didn’t do anything at the shop so that’s why my MIL was the one scolding the boy. MIL was actually worried but got angry and all so stressed out. She had not yet recovered from her trauma from the flood and now this. I pity her more this time and felt so bad when I saw her cried at the living room all by herself before I went to bed. I know she cared for the boy but discipline is a MUST. I’ve heard loud banging at the bedroom but I bet the mom was just trying to scare her son but could not afford to scold him. Darn it. If that’s my kid, I would have spanked him with the belt. My kids, especially my eldest daughter, is not even spared from spanking to think she’s not as hard-headed as that boy. Not because the boy has special needs, everything can be tolerated. The boy can understand despite of what he lacks. I’ve realized that the discipline instilled to him was not consistent, hence, the boy kept repeating the same mistake. As the saying goes, spare the rod and spoil the child…
I hope by tomorrow, instead of leaving her son behind at home, the mother will bring him with her and let him help her. I don’t mind if the mother will leave the younger daughter. The girl’s quite naughty but when I tried to discipline her, at least she listens. I told her that saying bad things is NOT acceptable at home and so far, she tried to obey. I never imagined raising hard-headed kids at a very young age. I’m proud to say that my 8 year old daughter never ever said bad things or even defy us. Although at times she disobeyed, I’ve realized that other kids are 10x worst. But if only the parents will show good example or at least teach their kids to be polite and obedient, I strongly believed that the child will follow or take heed. I don’t know what else will happen in our house for the next days or weeks but I sure hope everything is under control… by who?… perhaps by ME.
